All time low

My confidence is at an all time low
I can’t seem to find my get up and go
While my confidence is oh so low

A laneway of trees
The late summer breeze
No sense of unease in me
You see, my strap muscles grew
Turned into a noose
Pull and it’s easy for you to be
Without worry

Misshapen and atrophied positive point of view
It’s been an interesting trip to say the least
Now these lovely people I’ve met have appetites to whet
When you’re finished trying to be the ghost at the feast

My confidence was at an all time low
Never a truer word spoken, you had to go I wish
I could say ‘nice to know you’

Barney's magic dog

Have you ever seen a dog run like that mad fucker Barney’s magic dog?
He’ll rip your bollocks off and tear it in tiny pieces, Barney’s magic dog
Barney’s magic dog has run away
Barney’s magic dog ain’t here today

Chest beater

Is this a mating display that’s gone and lost its way?
Your little pantomime has wasted quite enough of my time
You know that needlessly striving, weakness-denying,
Steady degradation is worse
So don’t you worry about the living and dying
Puking and crying
Just leave it to the experts

Walking on the wind
Your words ain’t coming in loud and clear
Cos you’re talking nonsense
Truth it bends in a torus when the cracks appear

I don’t care about your imagined conquests
Supposed banging-prowess
Your fickle outlook
How many merry go round routes you took
And while sea eagles are flying
You’re ego-supplying
Shovelling your crumbling self-worth
Your grasp upon the monomyth’s tenuous
Obscene, disingenuous
Your true emancipation will hurt

Walking on the wind
Your words ain’t coming in loud and clear
Cos you’re talking nonsense
Yeah, you’ve friends
But what makes you think that they want to hear your bullshit?

Cos I’m a chest beater - I’m a born leader
I’m a dispute feeder
An affection needer
Let all the rest peter away their time
Neither standing here nor there
While I hide my despair beneath choreographed airs and graces
And Instagram faces I’m bouncing off walls
Making you feel small and peaceful by comparison
It’s embarrassing that this well-worn and jaded show
Is all I know

Cigarettes and wine

Becoming soaking wet with dew
And lately all I want to do is drink it up
So glorious
The hurried multitudes all march in time
Each step a hammer to my addled mind
That scoops me up to an attic room
Outside of time

With cigarettes and wine
And you, by my side
Cigarettes and wine
With you, taste so fine

Waltz me through your photographs
Watch the guitar doze upon my lap
And sigh as vinyl dies
Through the window, smoke escapes
Skip out and see the shape it makes
A diaphanous stair we trip through
On bare feet and firework minds

With cigarettes and wine
And you, by my side
Cigarettes and wine
With you, taste so fine

Dead swinger

The night is foggy, his path is clear
He watches you walk out of here, following close
The cobbles slippy with mud and mist
A hasty glance down at your wrist
The night’s a ghost

Lamplight shines its last
The crowd has long since past
Now it’s just you sharing the morning chills
With a hey there stranger mind if I join you?
Mind if I slide my eyes up on you?
No need for talking, wandering, walking
I’ll eat those clouds from out your mouth

(hey) soul digger
(please) lane whistler
(don’t) dead swinger
(leave) dead swinger

Memory throws up a magpie from out its nest
Due to die, you ask mom why
I’m sorry son that’s just the way things are
When little birdies stray too far
Just let it lie
That circumstance aside
There is a frenzy in these eyes
The kind that roots you to the spot until

You hear a Dead swinger

Give me a sign

The winter stripped my muscles bare
Black icicles and solitaire
And no one seemed to hang around
This nowhere
Hallucinations fill the air
Old bicycles and rusty hair
That disappear without a sound
When I stare

Give me a sign, oh lord
Something that’s mine
I’ve heard what’s right for you won’t pass you by

So a secret season rolls around
Spreads fresh white carpet on the ground
Yet currents warm and perfumes fair
Seem to surround me
Til I’m swept away
In a spectacular daze
The unpredictability of now seems to say

“Wear your cloak, your gratitude
Seek out your folk, the righteous few
With gentle words and energy”
May what I deserve come back to me

Going through the motions

I’m digging it out
I’m building it now
It’s in the ground
I’m digging it now

While plucking on these bass strings
I long for neon shores
My Janus face sings “There’s me, and me on tour”
Sleepless blood is racing
My edges curl with fire
In heated anticipation
Of a ride to somewhere higher
Higher

I’m passed-out on the coat-tails
Just being dragged along
The dusty broken glass trails
Of some old bastard’s song
Still...it’s the life of legends
Rubbing shoulders with the bards
Ignoring cries of dead-ends
Head is older, heart is hard
Heart is hard
So hard

I’m digging it out
It’s something to get freaky about
I’m building it now
It’s reinforced for when shit gets loud
It’s in the ground
A fallout shelter for this Late Late town
I’m digging a hole
A reservoir for my soul

I’m going through the motions
It’s a venomous waste of days
I’m sick and tired of all these wires
This jaded, bloodless maze
A man of few emotions
My fun is just part-time
I’m done with feeling sixty
Vexted, reeling twenty-five
I’m done with going through the motions
Floundering in oceans of acidic soul-corrosion
It’s drawing to a close
So this show’s on me

Grey day

It doesn’t matter where you go
Doesn’t matter what you see in me
Doesn’t matter what you say
It’s a grey day to me
The walls laugh at omens past
That silly bastard misery
Is out of tricks but for his last
Throws a grey day at me

The mood slides, you stay inside
Your mind churns as day turns to night
And a city of pages lures you in
Well-thumbed amber places welcome you with a grin
You know it’s been ages since you’ve had a drink
Meander and come upon your dusty friends
We’ll meet again with hollow souls
The couch swallows you whole

Regurgitated and new
A spectral assembly dance all around you
A surge of red, green and blue
The spectrum resembles the somersault world you knew
When you rubbed your eyes as a child
Son of all things wild
You won’t grow today, so there’s just no way
You’ll know a grey day

Losing it

I’m wearing circles in the floor
Drowning in the clothes I wore a month ago or more
You know the simple things in life are best
I clutch my tea like mother’s breast
The crows eat cake while I rest

OCD patrol
The white space has been breached
Dead tv spits static through me
But at least I’m not losing it

You know I pace these empty halls at night
I turn to smoke, do what I like
Tomorrow when it’s bright I’ll go outside

But the crowds down there don’t look too civilized
Just try it out sunshine you might just be surprised
There’s clothes to dry and screens to fry my dusty eyes
I’m frozen solid, hours go by, I realise that I’m losing it

Massive Pockets

Keep your stupid comments in your massive pockets
They say he’s got them massive pockets
Hey! He could be slipping you into them right now
He’s giving you his heart

He’s got massive pockets yeah they’ll never rip
Galaxies at his fingertips
It’s hot, well maybe at least for a little bit
Seven years or so to be precise
But maybe that’s just the cynic in me
“No man’s gregariousness could be so inexhaustible”
I guess we’ll see
It makes you wonder do you understand life

Massive pockets
They say he’s got them massive pockets
Hey! He could be slipping you into them right now
You’re tearing him apart

He’s got a kind word for everybody on the street
Even people that you’d rather iron your sack than meet
He’ll blow your mind with spontaneous generosity
And leave you scrambling, shambling, wondering how
How does he do it?
There must be something to it
That trust – he’ll overdo it
Cos people can be much trickier than a guy with massive pockets

They say he’s got them massive pockets
Hey! He could be slipping you into them right now
So watch your step

Old

I’ve been waiting for you to come by for quite some time
(and that’s no lie)
The big surprise is on your face
There’s magic flowing all over this place

There’s a swamp right in front
(and right behind)
Although your mind is cracking up and running dry
Let down your hair and grab that wine
And get it all over with before it gets old

I made an effort once
You remember that
You might like to live like this but I won’t
You remember that
And grind all your teeth right down while you sit at home
And chew the fat, you’re good at that
15 years ain’t long
15 weeks ain’t long
15 days ain’t long
15 hours ain’t long

Precious

What’s wrong with you?

Sitting on a precious mountaintop
Observing the trees
Swaying in the breeze
Doing just as they please
Your shadow peeps out from beneath a rock And whistles a tune
“Your time is coming soon…”
Swap the sun for the moon

A plague of fantasies descends upon
This haven of mine
And though I know I’m fine
It’s amazing to watch them dine
They're tearing the horizon from the ground
It’s cracking like ice
They’re pulling me inside
Where nothing is born, or dies

We’ll fashion a mask of all your paper planes
(you love it too, don’t you? love it)
Get passionless, bask in awe
Your growing pains hold sway in your head
Groundless and extreme
The source of your dread distressful dreams
If you don’t love it
Why don’t you chuck it out?

A hair emerges from my head
It’s boldly grey amidst brown
As I swim in sound
To you, I’m just fucking around
But while the outside world is grey
My soul replays symphonies
I grab at them and squeeze a mountain
For you and me

A wondrous time was had by all concerned
(you know it too, don’t you? know it)
The candle has died, both ends have been burned away
The friends that you keep love you as you are
Day ends and you sleep, your lover in your arms
If you know it
Why don’t you show it now?

What’s wrong with you?
Don’t bother me
My heart’s abreeze
Treating myself like a precious object
Will make me

Rootless

You can dance, you can move
You can slide, you can groove
If you want to

Rootless, use this form that
You just borrow for a while

You can get your face wet
There’s no law against it yet
If you want to
You can spend all your time
In a bottle of wine
If you want to

But you get lost in a screen
Til your insides turn green
And the buds in you sprout
Til the woods seem to shout out your name
It’s in vain, cos you’ve locked up your brain
It’s a shame

Where’s your smile?
Gimme that smile

This ends now

Come sailing on this little boat I made
We’ll take a tour of all the little things you hate
And you’ll see the light, you’ll see that life is not what you make it
Strip off your skin, the mess you’re in
Just lie down and take it

A little whirlpool right inside your brain
The paper cripples as it ripples down the drain
You wanted me more than words could say
I lick your wounds at the end of your weary days
But you waltz with your worries
You dance with your broken back
You’re twisted, contorted
You’re kittens in a burlap sack

One day I’ll whittle all your dreams away

Took a walk

I took a walk down the other side
To see what I could see
The flowers and trees all started to hide
There’s nothing here for me
The squirrels chatter like machine gun fire
And the moisture on my eyeballs started to freeze
Beneath the stones, the dead rattle their bones
But there’s nothing here for me

So take a little break from your big mistakes
And live a life, for once, all of your own

Now I turn into a massive lung
And drink up the day
The trees all leap from the soil
And they leave a colossal empty space
Where seasons blend Reason ends
Every corner, a friend
What kind of message is the world sending?
With robins on branches
Conspirators’ glances
Hypnotic red trances
And you
I nearly missed you

Yeah take a little break from your bellyache
And live a life, for once, all of your own

Too little / too late

You say that I’m falling from grace right now?
The back of your head has my face
How it howls!
“I’ll see you when you come down tomorrow”
This shit’s been such a let down
Too little too late
Two insurmountable walls you erect
I’ve bashed my skull off them all
And yet you’ve clawed at every work-round
No, no, no
I’m black and blue and broke down
Too little too late

I’m sorry to say that we’ve come to the end of the line
The dreams that you cling to just ain’t gonna ring true this time
Dissolving our smiles into piles at the scene of the crime
We never did have that aforementioned whale of a time
No!

This is where I sulk...
And see how much you like it! Too childish?
Come on and undermine it
Too little too late
I gave you my heart, I gave you my soul
Gave me a hatful of impurities, doubt, insecurities
Take em and make em yours!
Make em yours
That’s give and take

Save me from this importunity and bury me in a shallow grave
Where fortune shares serenity with what’s left of me
Dig me up, send me some other place where loving hands can fix me
Into some delightful shape
A brand new man

Whole

A silent blue electric sound
Arrests your ears, rolls around
And it consumes the empty fields between your thoughts
It feels serene, but you’re not a bit immune
Or able to resist
It speaks the language of your soul
Takes you by the wrist
Pulls you from your hole
Into the night

Fly in inverted castle dreams
Replace your eyes
It’s not what it seems
It’s not in you
No it’s not And it can’t bring you away
From the life your heart wishes for
It speaks the language of your soul Takes you by the wrist
Pulls you from your hole
Fills you with light

When it’s over, you’ll be older
And wiser too
With a strong head on your shoulder
Nice to climb into
Strike a balance
Let this challenge embolden you
And it’s over before you know it
Its hold on you

Workin'

I’ve been working like a demon, day and night
Trying to find something that’ll chill my mind
Yeah, fiddling and foostering away my time
With crepuscular soliloquies
And half-distilled pigeon-willed brain moonshine
Plans and schemes and pipe dreams with a twist of lime
So if the way you see yourself seems a tad unkind
Stop in your tracks, relax, and grab a piece of mind

It’s not the crowd’s rush, not the rocks thrust
Not your disgust, not the tired faces
Not used-to-be-nice places, bombast
Not the bombs blast, clocks that run fast
Not artless provocation, academic masturbation
It’s not the spinning round, dizzy
Greyhound-skirt herd of dirtbirds
Out in this weather?
Parents should know better

It’s the unconscious dose
RSI-in-the-wrist ghosts
Aspire to exist only
In a daze while they expire slowly
Screen-stealers
Our dream-weavers
The team-leaders
And time-bleeders
Know where they’ll lead us
Nowhere to lead us
Nowhere

Your brain’s under beta strain
Think only in terms of gain
Your heart and your soul
Are not coming back again
Forget all you used to know
Your brain needs relaxing when you’ve been
Working like a demon

World of your own

Never did no wrong
Never did enough
Ever make a song and dance
For fancy folk you thought were above you?
Throw your hat at it
Out hops a rabbit
He points a paw and laughs at your ceaseless pursuit of love
But oh those simple melodies
They put your mind at ease
Here in this world of your own
A world of your own creation

Give it all you got
Think you’re fine, but you’re not
Ambitions rot because you left them far too long on the shelf
Deep down you insist
That you’re an idealist
Do you remember optimistic you, how good she felt? No?
Do you recall your altruistic view, your heart of wealth? No?
Then the simple energies
Are all that you need
Here in this world of your own

If you’re distracted by the bitterness you face
Kicking back against the rats within your race
If the world makes you struggle getting out of bed
Girl there’s no trouble, make another one to live within instead
And get out of your head!

Now you gaze into the trees
And graze on twitching leaves
Here in this world of your own
All of your own